Did you know that in San Franciso, there are 39% more DOGS than there are children! In Oregon, dogs outnumber three to one! And they now are wanting to LEGALLY change the term “pet owner” to “pet guardian” thus nullifying some of the decision-making rights of Americans and their furry friends. Sounds like a furied frenz if you ask me. That’s not the tree we’ll be barking up today, but I did want to give you some puppy chow for thought.
I usually believe the opposite of what people say. If someone tells me, “It’s fine, no problem!” They are secretly wishing ill-will upon me and thinking, “Die you-good-for-nothing-little-twat.” If someone tells me something, I most certainly think they mean the opposite. Like how my parents told me they would never get a dog. And then they got this crazy thing on the left. And they also told me they would NEVER let their dogs walk all over them, yet you can clearly see this one sitting at the dining room table. Thank goodness we didn’t have the governor over for tea that day.
Opposites day everyday. So don’t worry, I don’t expect you’re going to come back and take a walk with me when you say you will. I have no expectations that I will get a letter in the mail from you, a phone call, or that email you’ve been promising me for months. I most certainly wouldn’t get my hopes up that we are actually going to hang out.
Sadly, after a long, arduous history of people canceling on me, changing plans, being fake with me, or telling me what I need to do that in actuality is only in THEIR own best interest, I’ve stopped believing people. Even at times, my own family and friends words have fallen to the floor like lead weights, while simultaneously holding no weight.
Now, granted, this is not always people being dishonest. In fact, I don’t think people are aware of the fact that they are deceiving you, nor trying to be pathological liars. I think it is more about defense and survival: acting in ways in which you are sure to be able to come across as pleasing everyone or making everyone happy, even when you’re certainly unable to do so. It’s also projecting who we WANT to be to the world around us, rather than being who we are in the present moment. We lie to ourselves! About the past, the future, and the present. People lie about things they are guilty about too, like how late they stayed out, how much they drank, how many sit ups they “did” and how they quit eating gluten and animal products. I told myself that I was going to wash my car today, even though in the very back of my mind and in my gut, I knew I wouldn’t get to it until Saturday, and then I proceeded to tell someone else…just to make myself sound more productive. But. It never got done. Now, in reality, this is all for the better because my boyfriend is going to stick a bunch of dirty batteries and crap in there to haul to the junk yard. The repercussive feelings I feel having not completed a task I said I would, are inconsolable. I had to do 100 Hail Mary’s (in my case this means doing a load of laundry and folding it) to make up for my laziness.
This is one of the reasons I have started to NOT tell people projects that I am up to, or ideas that I have until after they are seen through to completion. I have had entirely too many failings, mishaps, and false alarms where I wore my heart on my sleeve, only to be left out in the cold with a wife beater. Not that I am crying over spilled milk.
I recently read a book, and continue to refer back to it on a regular basis, that has really reformed my way of viewing these situations, as it applies to my own responsibilities, as well as my responses to others.
The Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz is a book which takes religion out of spirituality and inserts practicality and logic. In a word, these are lessons and mantras which EVERYONE can live their lives to, for, and by, without feeling they are somehow cheating on their belief system. If we followed these four laws, life would truly be paradise.
Let’s just take a sneak peek by delving into the life-changing power of adhering to the First Agreement:
Be Impeccable With Your Word
What are words? Words are an expression of the emotions, thoughts, beliefs, and what-nots flying around inside of our cellular worlds. They are essentially the essence of putting these intangible elements into a voice which other people can identify. They are the building blocks of a person’s relationship with the outside world. Not speaking can also be a form of using your words, as often actions such as kisses, hugs, hitting someone, etc. could be an even stronger expression of what is inside than the English language could word vomit.
Imagine I took this literally. I was impeccable with my word. I let my inner truths, and beliefs be expressed and followed the Purple Brick Road, rather than the yellow one, like my heart so desired. Gosh, this seems like it requires vigilance, awareness, and great care taken to what I am doing and saying. Are my words lining up with my actions? Are my actions lining up with my beliefs?
It’s a real game changer. If you’re more interested in this topic, you should check out the book The Four Agreements.
Need more enticing to get to that great read? Check out this website and what this man says on being impeccable with your word, I guarantee it’s much better than my words.